The Beauty of the Mundane

What gives meaning to life

In the image above a rower takes a boat full of people on a brief tour. This is his or her job. We often work in exchange for money which we then use to pay for food, lodging and other necessities. We prioritize work because we need food and shelter and an income helps us to have those things.

But suppose you don’t have to “work” for your income. When we work we derive an incredible sense of fulfillment from what we are doing. We are making a contribution. This gives us a sense of purpose.

When we no longer work, what brings satisfaction to our days? I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about this since I entered my retirement years. I actually recommend that people continue to work into retirement because of the need we all have to feel needed. Of course you can find ways to contribute without financial remuneration.

The need for a sense that we are contributing is very basic to our well-being. I think we are created in such a way that we intrinsically want to feel useful.

I have been thinking that one of the very basic ways in which we can feel satisfied is by enjoying the mundane things we all do from day to day, apart from our “employment.” Here are several examples of what I am talking about.

Look at the person who is rowing the boat in the photograph. It is not the most glamorous job. It is a job of service to others. In our day to day activities we have many opportunities to “row the boat.”

First of all, we can take good care of ourselves. We do our laundry so that we have clean bedding to sleep on and clean clothing to wear. We shower and dress comfortably and style our hair and maybe add a few accessories to enhance our appearance. Remember the old saying, “When you look good, you feel good, and when you feel good, you look great.”

We clean up our surroundings. We exercise, go for a walk, read or watch something that uplifts us. In other words, we build ourselves up and as a consequence we feel good about ourselves.

The first and most basic thing we do is care for ourselves and the setting we are in.

I’ve begun to enjoy what in the past I would have referred to as the mundane. Things I once thought of as boring and ordinary and did because it was necessary, have become a special part of my day. I enjoy my daily upkeep routine. I’m not sure when this change began to happen but it had something to do with the realization that we can lose the ability to be able to care for ourselves and also with the awareness of how special it is to have a place to call home.

I get a sense of satisfaction when the counters are cleared, dishes are done, the laundry is dried and the floors are clean. I’ve become aware that these activities also give me a regular light work-out. I use this time doing chores to calm my mind and put myself in a state of peace and contentment. I take breaks. I work at my desired pace. I might prepare a cup of tea or coffee on the side.

I grew up in a home where we did housework and yard work and gardening because it had to be done. It was something you needed to get behind you. The word “chores” comes to mind and unfortunately it didn’t have a very positive connotation.

Now, as I’m doing the dishes I think about how well I have planned my kitchen. I delight in the fact that I have so many of the exact items I need for cooking and baking. I think of possibilities of meals I could prepare; maybe I begin to plan for a special occasion when I can have people over.

My husband is always appreciative of any work I do around the house or any dishes I serve. To have someone with whom to share your work and who notices your accomplishments is also a source of joy.

When we look for meaning, we look for ways we can contribute, ways we can be helpful and lift the load and maybe bring joy to others.

Someone once said to me that we can’t export what we don’t possess. I remember living in the Philippines where certain products were considered as “export quality.” The best quality was for export. But it’s ok to value ourselves as worthy of “export quality” as well. If we first bring joy to our own lives by living a quality life, we will be developing skills and habits that will inevitably bring joy to others as well. It will feel like a natural outflow.

Basic care for ourselves and our surroundings is like building a good foundation on which we can then add any number of other building blocks in the form of endeavors and accomplishments.

Yes, we can ignore self-care. We can ignore tending to the things entrusted to us. We can ignore up-keep. But it will make us less happy. I’m pretty sure of that.

Sometimes “chores” are just that. We enjoy the result more than the process. But a little shift in our thinking can change our experience. Instead of the “daily grind” we can think of making these moments special in some way.

I am always looking for ways to make my setting more pleasant, more appealing. Ways to streamline my life. Things I can do to be more healthy and content.

My home decor, how I prepare and present my food, and my perspective and demeanor, are what I share with the world, just as much—and sometimes more—than, my “work.” This opportunity of sharing ourselves is available to us all. We can all do something to improve ourselves and our space so that we derive greater joy out of life, unless we find ourselves in the unfortunate place of being disabled or homeless. But even in these circumstances some people find ways to turn the lemons of life into lemonade, so to speak. I think of the impact of Joni Eareckson Tada, a paraplegic injured in a diving accident who has brought hope to many through her art and speaking and writing.

When I visit others in their homes I see the effort they went to, the details they attended to. A clean house and good food is the result of careful planning and preparation. I feel honored. I am inspired.

When I was a teen I visited the home of a single woman perhaps ten or fifteen years older than me. She served us a simple salad and spaghetti and ended our meal with parfait glasses of sherbet topped with a wafer. The presentation felt so elegant to me at the time. I wanted to learn how she did it.

I don’t want to put pressure on people. We can serve toast and coffee with the laundry waiting to be folded beside us. There is a spectrum, with one end being our near best and the other being whatever we can manage in the moment. Just to be with someone is special. We can’t and shouldn’t wait for everything to be perfect. But we can aspire to the thing that brings us joy.

I am currently in Vietnam and as I visit various restaurants and coffee shops I take note of the many ways guests are shown hospitality. It may be arrangements of fresh, local flowers, or unique seating and table pieces, or any number of decorative elements, often very inexpensively done. Here are a few examples. The attention to the service of drinks is lovely and often the order is accompanied by a cup of jasmine tea.

This is a lychee drink I had at the Bayside Restaurant in Ha Long Bay. I appreciate the wide variety of fresh juices available here.

This breakfast was delicious but what I remember most from the Art Cafe in Da Nang was the appreciation I felt from the owner who gave me a hug as we were leaving. We frequented her business a number of times.

Here is another fancy drink from a 445 Cafe in Hoi An. The staff was very friendly and accommodating. I tried their freshly juiced orange and carrot drink on another occasion. In the hot weather these cold drinks are incredibly refreshing. I was impressed by the attention to detail in the decor, as I am in so many of these small, privately owned businesses.

My emphasis, as I write, is on finding enjoyment even if what we are doing is just for ourselves. We all carry a treasure within us and the world waits for us to share it, whether it is a smile, a kind word, a helping hand, or opening our home to others. The most important thing is to value this life, these moments and the gifts that make up our daily lives.

Avocado Bistro and Cafe in Hoi An, Vietnam.